we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
