I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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