Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
