Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
