Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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