At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
