She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
