Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
