Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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