oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
i think i just lost a toe
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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