I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i drank out of a bidet.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
