I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
