So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
