She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
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