Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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