so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
