You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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