I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
