didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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