Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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