OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
