my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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