im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Randomize
