Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
