FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
