we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
