Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
