so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
