Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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