I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
The beer is more important than you right now.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
