marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
