I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize