The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize