K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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