If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
