He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
