accomplished twins. life is a go
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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