I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
