i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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