i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
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