grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
