those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Your dad touched me again.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Damn victory sex feels great
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
