I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize