you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
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