sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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