Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
