My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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