Define "chronic" masturbator.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
