Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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