I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
