I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
