Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
