If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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